If I were to die in a week, what would I be doing?
Very close to a year ago, I was sitting at my regular bar, and a guy asked me "What would you be doing right now if you had only a week left to live?". Of course I answered "I would get the f*ck out of here, make art and contact my family."
That question really put things under perspective and really stroke me, yet, guess what I did? Nothing. I kept on going to the same bar almost every single day, completing all my homework at the last minute and avoided talking to my family. It would be pretty natural for me to say that it was one bad year for me, and it was all my fault. I wasn't very generous, my actions were all selfish and I assumed a lot of things were other people's fault.
Grief is a complex process, it started two years ago with the death of my father, and it sneaked up on my subconscious and showed its symptoms in unexpected and hidden ways. But it is also one thing I seemed to enjoy blaming.
Thankfully, over the course of the year, I wasn't entirely useless and I have created photographs, paintings, drawings, diary entries that I am proud of.
I will give you all that comes to mind when I think of "2016".
I started the year exploring watercolors, during Spring I spent 6 hours a day in a darkroom, went through the Summer on 90%stock photography and photoshop, and finished the year with work I absolutely loved doing. A huge mix of all the mediums I experimented with, and funnily enough, I came back to the way I shot when I started to realize photography was my calling, 8 years ago!
Last movies of 2016.
Eyes of my Mother
Most disturbing thing I have ever seen. Visually a masterpiece, everything about it was just the way it was supposed to be, but, I do not recommend it to anybody! Spent the last 30 min crying with my eyes closed.
Visually attractive to my eyes (If you look at the tones of my images, you will get why). I was surprised by how endeared I ended up feeling.
Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them
I seriously loved it more than Harry Potter! I've been so obsessed with creatures and monsters, that this movie was exactly what I needed in order to keep the "monster flow" going.
Here are my last books read in 2016. Books you all know.
Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
A classic, and the second to the last one of the year. Just the fiction I needed after a year of learning how to stop being so damn proud and stubborn.
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland & Through the Looking Glass - Carol Lewis
Last book of the year. It's such a shit show, it's too crazy! I like The Little Prince so much for its simplicity, and the space it gives you for you to say "I will pause and think now". When do you get to do that in Wonderland?! Oh well, after reading it, I did enjoy Tim Walker's book "Storyteller" many degrees more, since I was already living in Wonderland at that point.
The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings - J.R.R Tolkien
Of course. I'm all about fantasy and imagined worlds. This one needs to be visited and revisited as many times as possible.
Nietzsche: Philosopher, Psychologist, Antichrist - Walter Kauffman
A present from my Godfather. Getting into that would take at least an entire other article, and the appropriate mood or "flow".
Chromeo's Old 45's! That song followed me since the first of January til the 31st of December. That shit's awesome.
Wise Blood's Alarm. Why doesn't anyone know this! Everyone that has come over to my place and heard it, also happened to fall in love with it.
I have so many other songs to share, but those two really stood out of the crowd.
If you want to get out of your way to hear what I've listened to this year, feel free to follow my Spotify here. I have a playlist for each month of the year. (No seasons in San Francisco, you gotta keep track of time one way or another!)
I think that's it for the 2016 sharing. I really wanted to share my favorite photographers, painters, etc. But if I don't limit favorites, this would go on forever. There will be separate articles for them.
I'll finish this entry with this touching, touching image. This is how I will approach 2017. And this is what I would do if I were to die in one week.